Series and Serials

The Use of Words, Part One (Profanity)

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LanguageDisclaimer: though censored, this blog post will be using words that are profane and not fit for all company. This is not a devotional, but it is from a Christian’s perspective. I have bias. You have been warned. 

Me and the idea of vocabulary have an interesting relationship. Notice that I don’t say my vocabulary  specifically, but rather, the general idea of the use of words. I don’t fret as much with what words I use as with how I use the words I use. The purpose of talking, for the most part, is to convey a message. Though I know people who seem to be able to talk without conveying any coherent message. Thus, my brain often automatically chooses the words that are associated in my head with some concept or another. I choose the words that I think will most readily convey the message that I intend to relate. I’m by nature an introvert, and most of what I say is calculated beforehand and, to me at least, is important at some level.

But we were talking about vocabulary. Let’s do that.

On Swearing

I was raised in a conservative Christian home, and the topic of swearing was not a major theme in my house, but I was taught throughout my life that language is an important part of how we present ourselves to others. I cannot ever recall either of my parents swearing in any sense of the word, though “non-profane” exclamations were frequently uttered (crap, dang, darn, crud, etc…). I remember hearing my neighbor use that particular four letter word that is used for excrement, and I was quite curious as to its meaning. (My parents were not happy with the new word I had learned, and they ensured that he was sober before I was entrusted to his company again.) I was not exposed to much foul language in everyday conversation when I was younger–partly owing to the company my family kept, and partly owing to the social environment that pervades much of the Southern U.S.

Now that I’m older and have had the chance to really consider the implications of the words that I use, I still do not swear, per se. I do still use various exclamations, but they’ve never been a profanity substitute for me; they’re just exclamations that take the form of words. That’s my take, anyway. Allow me to attempt to explain.

I view profanity in three distinct levels. First of all is the use of exclamations. I’ll call exclamations words that occur after a moment of surprise, disgust, horror, etc.

Wow! That house is huge!

Dang! Why did you have to sneak up on me like that?

D**n, man! What are you wearing?

Let’s start with the first, simple exclamation. We can obviously have words that are used when people are surprised or mad, but that have no negative connotations. Nobody would or does consider these words profanity. I’ve never heard “hey, watch your language,” after someone says “wow!.” These words exist to express our emotions in an audible and standardized form.

The second level is comprised of exclamations include the “non-profane” words that are sometimes cited as profanity substitutes. I use these words fairly often, and I do regret the frequency with which I do use them, but I don’t consider their use morally wrong. I merely regret at times that my vocabulary includes words that are at their best annoying and at their worst vulgar. Let’s use the word “crap” as an example. This word has been used so commonly as an exclamation that its origin has been largely overshadowed. If someone calls a thing crap, he is calling it worthless or nonsense, but he is not necessarily calling it excrement. The word is vulgar, disgusting, and unfortunate, but it is not profane.

I have heard arguments that this level of exclamation is merely a substitute for profanity, and while this may sometimes be the case, I do not think that it is a rule. Excrement is not by default called by a profane name. Excrement is disgusting, repulsive, and generally not something with which we want to be associated, but it is not profane. Vile things are easily made profane, but let’s not dissolve into that discussion. The most neutral term for excrement is excrement. Moving up the scale, I would say that poop and crap are generally on the same level, though the first is more juvenile. Neither of these are profane. Only moving up that scale do we get to the language that is considered profane, and I will trust that the reader will know to what word I am referring. Perhaps if one has become accustomed to swearing, then the use of a second-tier  word may be substitutionary, but that does not bring that word up to the level of an inherently profane word.

From a Christian perspective, I would say that it would be best for us to refrain from the use of second-tier language for two reasons, the first being that some are easily offended or tempted to swear, and we should be accommodating of as many as possible, especially when all we must do is avoid certain verbiage. The second reason that I give is that some words are just generally not quality vocabulary. The root of crap is excrement, and comparisons to excrement should generally be reserved for something that is genuinely worthless, deserving of being called refuse. Flippant references to excrement are, in my opinion, not the best use of our vocabulary, and I think that the Bible is quite clear on doing everything we do to the best of our capability. Are we sinning when we use second-tier language? Probably not, but I don’t think it should be a habitual occurrence.

Let’s move on to the third level. This level is that plane on which resides those words that are not acceptable in the presence of minors (miners are ok, though) and polite company. These words have been largely marginalized and accepted by society, yet their use still determines the ratings of movies and games, the appropriateness of conversations, and whether or not one should put a warning before one’s blog post. Self-references for the win. This level is a place that I’ve always found interesting. Certain words are considered less-offensive than others, but they still find themselves in the realm of profanity.

I’d like to make an argument for the disuse of profanity, but let’s start by exploring why people use profanity. Profanity seems to be more and more often seen in mainstream society as an institution that is acceptable and normal. The shock factor of certain words has worn off, and vocabularies have been stunted in the area of exclamations. This is unfortunate in itself, but I have an equal problem with marginalization of definitions. It is not uncommon to hear someone exclaim “d**n that idiot driver,” when in reality, if the speaker were to consider the source meaning of the verb in his statement, he might reconsider his proclamation. This could bring us to a discussion of intention versus statement, but I’ll stay away from that for now. Suffice it to say that I think that this is unfortunate and indicative of a much larger problem.

I think that many people who regularly and casually use profanity do so without an intentional thought as to what the words mean or imply. If this is the case, I would encourage them to consider the meanings of the words they say. I’d love to have a conversation about the intentions of a phrase versus the meanings of its individual components, so please feel free to comment.

The last note that I wish make might be obvious, but I feel that I should still say it. Certain profanity, in my mind, has a place in our vocabulary; the damnation or damning of an object is a proper use of the word, but the implications are serious and should be taken as such. Hell is a place, and I have no problem with the word Hell. Used as an exclamation, though, the place is trivialized to a mere utterance of surprise or anger. On that note, the use of “h-e-double-hockey-sticks” is an obvious substitutionary phrase. It’s amusing, yes, but it does nothing in the way of lessening your language. The allusion to a word is the same in the mind of someone who knows the word as the utterance.

Certain other profanity, however, has no place in our vocabulary, if we are attempting to use language in the best way possible. The various profane sexual words that refer to genitalia or or actions are purely vile. They have no redeeming value, and I am of the view that they should not be used. Excrement in its profane form is simply base. These words have no worth outside of shock value, and they can do nothing to add to our experience when conversing. Oftentimes, they have the opposite effect.

That’s all for now, and these are my thoughts on profanity in language.

~ Chris

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Top Ten (Benign) Stalker Songs of All Time (from my iTunes library)

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Well, okay, maybe not of all time, but at least of the selection that lives in my library of music.

Anchor & Braille — Wedding / Funeral

It’s a song written from the perspective of a guy who is feeling remorseful of letting go of an old friend. It’s for her funeral or wedding ’cause, you know, that’s not creepy.

“I’m a great burning lament to this day
But I realize now you’re in a better place
Hands will tremble
As you’re lowered down the aisle
But you won’t look at me
Not so much as smile
I want to stand up and speak my peace
And let your hollow pieces walk away.”

Dude, you’ve got some emotional issues. I’m seriously considering setting up an eHarmony account for you.

Cascada — Everytime We Touch

Ok, I don’t  think it’s meant to be a stalker song, but this lady is just a bit obsessive… Strangely enough, this video reminds me of Nirvana’s Smells Like Teen Spirit video, but I prefer this version. 

“I still hear your voice, when you sleep next to me.
I still feel your touch in my dream.
Forgive me my weakness, but I don’t know why
Without you it’s hard to survive.”

If you’re hearing voices, you should seek professional help.

GLaDOS — Still Alive

A song written just for me by a megalomaniacal  supercomputer who wanted to kill me. So sweet.

“I’m not even angry.
I’m being so sincere right now.
Even though you broke my heart.
And killed me.
And tore me to pieces.
And threw every piece into a fire.
As they burned it hurt because I was so happy for you!”

…anyway, you should play Portal if this makes no sense.

Stellar Kart — Kiss the Girl

Yes, this is a cover of a song from The Little Mermaid. Yes, I have this song in my iTunes library. LISTEN TO THOSE STALKER LYRICS, THOUGH.

“Yes, you want her
Look at her, you know you do
It’s possible she wants you too
There’s one way to ask her
It don’t take a word, not a single word
Go on and kiss the girl”

Death Cab for Cutie — I Will Possess Your Heart

The title says it all. Also, 4 minute guitar intro.

“You reject my… advances… and desperate pleas…
I won’t let you… let me down… so easily.”

I’m sorry, but, um, I’m calling the cops…

The Afters — Myspace Girl

“You asked me what I wanted… I want you!”

Would you like fries with that?

Needtobreathe — Girl Named Tennessee

This one’s just kind of like a failed stalker song…

“Oh, she danced away with my heart and soul
Who she was, I will never know
Danced away with my hopes and dreams
My sweet girl from Tennessee”

In one night, you placed all of your hopes and dreams in a girl? Overconfident, much?

Fall Out Boy — My Songs Know What You Did in the Dark

I’m really not even sure. Certainly sounds stalkerish to me…

Owl City — Deer In the Headlights

This was a free download from iTunes. I promise I didn’t buy this…

“Met a girl with a graceful charm,
But when beauty met the beast he froze.
Got the sense I was not her type
By black eye and bloody nose,
But I guess that’s the way it goes.”

No… I’m pretty sure you’re doing it wrong.

Relient K — Faking My Own Suicide

“To get your attention, I’m faking my own suicide…”

Yeah, yeah… that’ll do it.

And those are the stalker songs from my music library. What’s your favorite stalker song?

~XK

If Tech Companies Were In Charge of Holidays…

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…the press releases might read something like these.

Halloween 2 (Apple)

It’s the same holiday that you know and love, but we’ve made it even easier to celebrate. With over 25 million sweet stations, and a customizable candy choice, you can celebrate this iconic event from the comfort of your own city. With the Halloween 2, we’ve brought the holiday industry to new heights with new features such as Treats 2.0, iTricks, and Find My Gnome. Our revolutionary new Sweet Tooth bluetooth headset will let you post where you’ve found the best treats in your town or wherever you are! Find My Gnome is a convenient feature built into every Sweet Tooth; GPS signals allow you to track Sweet Tooths registered to your family. Rest assured that you’ll be able to find your way out of (or into) any scary situation.

With iTricks, just hold your iOS device against a prospective haunt, choose your flavor, and play a scary tone. Getting into the season has never been easier. Pre-order your Sweet Tooth today, and prepare yourself for the Halloween 2.

Easter (Facebook)

We’re excited to announce the best Easter yet: Easter 2014. Whether you plan to tag your friends in a new album or tag along with them to a relaxing picnic, we’ve got you covered. Our new News Feed is the same News Feed that we’ve always had, but this one is even more complicated and works better at least half of the time! With only one or two sponsored posts, and your settings staying set for an entire day, you are sure to enjoy the social scene this Easter. We’ve decorated our site in a lovely spring blue, and we’ve complicated the security settings even more! Make sure to have your Instagram app open and ready to capture all of your friends for filing in our extensive government database. (Also, do you know this person? You have 17 mutual friends.)

Memorial Day (Twitter)

It’s one of those Federal holidays that the majority of people really don’t know why it exists, and we know that you’ll want to document every minute of it in 140 characters or less. We’ve made sure that we won’t get hacked again anytime soon, and tons of celebrities will be posting valuable tidbits about their personal lives, and others’ personal lives. And how they hate that everyone is prying into their personal lives. And flame wars when someone says something perceivably racist or sexist. Actually, on second thought, just follow Death Star PR or Emergency Kittens.

President’s Day (Tumblr) 

We know that the only names you’ll recognize are George Washington, Abraham Lincoln, Obama, and John F. Kennedy, so we’re just going to continue posting clever GIFs.Tumblr's Contrib

Thanksgiving (Digg) 

Be Thankful for that iPhone
How the pilgrims survived that journey without Angry Birds.

Cooking Big Bird
Is America’s Turkey Obsession Unhealthy?

You’re Awesome (*sponsored link*)
Click it so we can make some money.

Several Buildings Explode in Another Country
You’ll click on this link because the US is obsessed with violence.

The Mayflower Didn’t Exist
It’s all a conspiracy to get you to spend money.

Read more on Digg.com >>

Christmas (Google)

Because we’re the most benevolent and wonderful company in the world, we’ve decided to give you an awesome drawing of our logo. Make sure to like it and share it on Google+! We also have put our Google Glasses on sale! $1400 buys you a pair of glasses with which you can search anything in the world! Download our newest version of Google Maps, which gives the location of every publicly available fir tree that you can chop down for yourself! Happy Holidays!

Anyway, have a good weekend! 
~XK