Coffee

My Blog Has Holes in It (How else do I explain all these drafts)

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I’m hoping WordPress will address this issue soon. My blog has some gigantic holes in it. I logged in today to find drafts everywhere. No sooner than I had finished filling in my password, did I feel a stiff breeze coming out of my computer screen. It knocked over several of the items on my desk, and I’ve lost a bunch of papers that simply flew away. This is unacceptable.

I just can’t explain the origin of all these drafts. Every time I start to write another post, another draft pops up, and I can’t seem to get anything published. Quite ridiculous, really.

Just the other day I started to write what I knew would be an absolutely superb piece on the moral dilemma that faces us when we are forced to make hard decisions. I got distracted by something in the other room, and I had to walk away from my blog. Somebody must have poked a hole in my site while I was away because there it was: another draft. Such Drafts

I think this all started way back when I tried to write a post about a rubber ducky. I smelled some pop tarts cooking in the other room, and I simply had to go find the source. My blog just hasn’t been the same since.

Fairie Tales, (trying to be) funny stories, inane antics, and completely ridiculous anecdotes, nothing seems to be able to get to that revered published state… I’ve combed through them all, looking for a way to maybe plug the hole and kill the draft, but nothing seems to work. I’ve tried rubber bands, chewing gum, duct tape, and even a few pots of coffee, but none of them solved my issue. I’m hoping that I can get this resolved soon.

I’m starting to think that this might be a problem with the whole blogging world. I’m certain that it’s not a problem with me. I’ll deny to the bitter end. I mean, I’ve been accused of procrastination before, but this is a structural problem, I’m almost certain of it. Brrr… It’s starting to get kinda cold in here. 

In the mean time, I think I’m going to… wait, someone’s at the door. I’ll finish this later. 

~ XK

 

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A Topic Very Dear to my Heart

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A topic which is very dear to my heart has recently invaded my mind as a matter of some import, for, you see, I realized that I have completely and utterly ignored this most important of items when writing in this blog. I did a quick review, and I found that I have designated exactly no posts to this extremely vital…. thing. Coffee. Yes, that nectar of the Fortunate Isles. The Promised Land was flowing with milk and honey, and one can only speculate that this was so that the Israelites’ coffee would not be barren. Coffee is that beverage that greets me when I awaken and is still ready for a sip before I settle down for the evening. Coffee goes with virtually every desert that doesn’t contain fruit, and chocolate, that wonderful food from the heavens, is one of coffee’s constant companions. Coffee can be enjoyed by one’s self, or it can be partaken of by an entire army. Water and fire are both needed to create it, and a host of additions can be made. Sugars, honeys, dairies, and an entire consortium of flavors can be combined to create any manner of coffee derivative, but in the end, it is still a coffee. I have compiled a list of possible things to do with coffee. Here it is.

  1. Use it in a cake. Yes, you could have coffee cake, coffee icing, coffee chips, coffee, um, flavor…
  2. Take a bath in it. Because everybody likes someone who smells like coffee. (It just might be a tad bit sticky…)
  3. Roast a bunch of coffee, pour it out, and repeat. ‘Cause really, the best part of coffee is the smell.
  4. Spread it in the lower atmosphere to create coffee rain. (IDK if that’s possible, but NASA, now that you’re not busy with moon stuff, wanna try it?)
  5. Make a deeply philosophical and socially-relevant music video about it.
  6. Build a castle. Surround said castle with a moat. Fill moat with coffee. Paint angry alligator faces on coffee beans and float them in the moat.
  7. Float rubber duckies in it, because rubber duckies like coffee, too.

    Yes, that's tea. Shhhh.
    Yes, that’s tea. Shhhh.
  8. Use it in a Super Soaker during a water fight. They’ll never see it coming. >.>
  9. Feed it to a class of pre-schoolers, and then run away very quickly.
  10. Write a blog post about it.

While such a short list is prohibitive and really insufficient to truly cover the boundless opportunities provided by such a wondrous substance, I really must end this post at some point. So, I regret to announce, this is the End. I am going now. I bid you all a very fond farewell. Goodbye.

(Until next time…)

~ XK

Breakfast

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Love it? Hate it? Indifferent?

I tend to be the that last category. I like breakfast, but I hardly ever eat it. I just don’t see the point. On days when I work, I get up too early (debatable, I know) to fix breakfast before I head to work, and on days that I’m off, I usually sleep in too late to justify eating breakfast.

Every once in a blue moon, though, when the stars align, the fates converge, and I forget to turn off my alarm clock, I decide to cook something for breakfast. This was one of those mornings. Actually, my dad woke me up a bit early today, but I still decided to cook some foodstuffs. Normally, when I consider cooking something for breakfast, that entails getting the toaster and popping in some Pop Tarts legacy post time. This morning, though, I wished for something a bit, more… dramatic.  After all, what’s a morning meal without toast, bacon, eggs, and random French music?