Completely Random

Speculatively Possible

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I’ve always loved it when people worry about something that had no chance of happening.


“Oh my gosh! If we would have gone a bit further we would have been stampeded by that flock of wild guinea pigs!!”


“Did you see that goat? That thing was mad! It could have run over here and eaten the top right off of our convertible!”

Well, perhaps those aren’t quite right. (I think that a group of guinea pigs would actually be a herd.) But, anyway, back to point. The lamentations of those worry prone peoples upon the formerly possible events that could have occurred. I always thought it was rather pointless to stress out about some things. I mean, if you narrowly miss getting run over by a bus, then yes, thank God and hope life doesn’t throw an instant replay at you for a second try. Now, if something is considered possible, it’s considered able to happen. If something didn’t happen, it wasn’t possible. So don’t stress out the next time you’re walking in the park and see a telephone pole fall right in front of your face. It might have been possible, at one time, for you to have been standing right where that pole fell. But you know what? It didn’t fall on you, and the event has occurred. Therefore, death by telephone pole was not on your roster for the day. It wasn’t even possible before it happened, because we now know how it turned out. As for a real world application:

The next time someone asks you:

“Do you think you Anakin could have stayed good, and not turned to the dark side?”

You can say:

“Nope, that’s impossible.”



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For those of you with iTouches, iPhones, iPads, or any number of capacitive screen devices. (Touch-screens with glass faces that are mostly multi-touch.) I have found a cheap, fun stylus that you can use! After much research and many years of toil upon the subject*, it has been found that Play-Doh works wonderfully as a stylus! Mold the handle into any shape, use multiple colors, and find it in any kid’s store!

There are a few downsides… Play-doh will dry out if I remember correctly, you will get strange looks at airports, and your hands smell like play-doh after every use (not necessarily a bad thing.)

So, try it out! Just think, a fun, edible stylus that you can use on your iPhone whenever you wish… What? You didn’t eat Play-Doh…?

* Not really, I actually discovered this while looking up castle embrasures and crenelations… I had Play-Doh in my hand… okay?


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  • Have you ever looked at the crazy labeling systems in stores? Here’s an example of where somebody’s plan for these strange vegetables went eschew.

I had no idea they were so desperate up there…
  • Moving on to the frozen foods section, we found these treasures. I sure have tons of fun whenever I eat chicken nuggets…

“Captain we are approaching the enemy base.”
“Fire phasers, Lieutenant.”
“Sir, they have dispatched a huge…. mouth?”
“What is that thing? Ahhh! Ketchup!!!”

"Jam-Packed With Loads of Fun in Every Bite!"
  • What better marketing ploy exists than to label something as alcoholic?  That must have been the thought process of somebody at Daily’s. I’m not sure if that is supposed to be a warning in disguise or an appeal to the redneck in us…
"Honey, have you been drinking the juice pouches again?"

So, next time you go to Walmart you should check out all of the little signs and labels. And… Help out the Canadians while you’re at it.