Our Speech Doth Appear as One Sundered

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I think that I’m going to start talking as though everything I say is of the utmost importance and make my sentences elaborate as possible. For example, when I need a knife from the kitchen:

Hearken unto me, my children, and give ear to my words, for it is no small doom that brings me hither. Unto this place I have come to request a boon. In the drawers of wood that lie herein, there is a blade of steel that stains not, and for this I make a most urgent request.

I may even try this when I go to McDonalds and other place of eatery.

Greetings my kind people, from the inscription upon the menu yonder would I like to place a request. Of the selection entitled four I would mean to make my own, and in payment I would take care to count out in bills of legal tender of this great nation.

I have an idea that this may not go over so well, but I think it’d be fun to try booking a flight like this.

Peace unto you and your family, my good lady. Of the security for transportation upon the winds of this world, like the fleet feet of Mercury in the sky, would I converse with you. To the distant lands of the West and the grand civilizations across this great expanse of the realm of Neptune would I traverse. Have you the necessary permissions to grant me the goodwill of those leading such an expedition?

I suppose this might not be the best way of relating to people, but who ever said I wanted to do that? Anyway, it’s almost the first of the year! One more day in 2012 and we shall find ourselves in 2013! I think I might write myself a long-term to-do list (I never have liked the phrase bucket list.)

Cheers!
~Chris

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3 thoughts on “Our Speech Doth Appear as One Sundered

    Tuna said:
    30 December , 2012 at 22:07

    Lol, write pick up lines next!

      xanthuskidd responded:
      1 January , 2013 at 13:10

      Only if I can get someone to volunteer to try them out… >.>

    dalecooper57 said:
    14 January , 2013 at 16:19

    Forsooth, thou art verily a wordsmith of abundant talents, honoured may I be to partake of your wisdom on a regular basis by way of the exigencies of the followence facilities.
    Your most obedient servant,
    dalecooper57.

    http://dalecooper57.wordpress.com/ – Diary of an Internet Nobody

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