Collateral Productivity

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So… let’s talk about procrastination. (and don’t say you’ll read this later.) I’m sure you’ve heard the jokes before, “Procrastinators Unite! (Tomorrow)” etc… But seriously, let’s take a look at this so called “problem.”

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Really, procrastination isn’t a huge problem with most people; let me explain why. Let’s say you have to do something, (walk your dog, write a paper, take a shower…) it’s something that you really should do, but you really don’t want to do it.

Now (building off the shower example), you’ve needed to take a shower for about a week now, you stink a bit, and people really don’t want to come near you. You should probably do it. You have other ideas though. You get on Facebook, write a paper, read a book, eat a cookie, eat ten cookies, wonder why there aren’t any pop tarts… anyway, I digress. Now, unless you’re one of those people that seriously doesn’t do anything when they’re procrastinating, (i.e. You sit in your chair staring blankly at the wall pondering how many bananas it would take to make a tribe of 20 monkeys happy for a year.) I have a viable excuse that you can use.

You aren’t procrastinating, you are accomplishing other tasks as a result of waylaying the completion of another. This is a tactic I like to call “Collateral Productivity.” You’re being productive, (I mean, socialization is key to good relationships, that paper seriously needed to be written, you learned a lot from that book on Star Wars, and really… those cookies were going to go stale soon anyways…) so procrastination really isn’t a good term. So the next time someone accuses you of procrastinating, look them square in the eyes and say, “I was being collaterally productive, thank you very much.” If you say it with enough confidence, you might even get away with it. 😉

P.S. – This is not a tactic recommended for use on school work, real work, important work , work with deadlines, or breakfast. Hierarchy of importance is key in these matters. So, go ahead, skip showering for a week, but really, don’t do it if you have a job interview, recruiters want to get to know you, but not that well.

P.P.S. – I don’t personally skip showers, that’d be nasty.

4 thoughts on “Collateral Productivity

    Mrs. Norris said:
    12 June , 2011 at 15:51

    Honey thats what I’ve been telling my neice ever since she moved in with me and started hounding me about taking my pills you know the doctor gave me these pills but they taste so nasty that I cant hardly stand them so, I do other things instead and do you know what I’ve gotten so much more done at night now instead of just sitting in front of my telly watching bill oriley for an hour.

    Mrs. Norris said:
    12 June , 2011 at 15:54

    but sometimes I do skip showers, you know because I just dont do much around the house anymore and I dont need to. It saves water too.

    Flameheart said:
    13 June , 2011 at 11:27

    Procrastination can be the source of creativity! All you need is:
    1. A boring essay to write
    2. a few coloured pens
    3. potential draft 1 of essay, which turns into a colourful mass of ‘ideas’
    and pOw! You have, not a boring essay, but an interesting creative mass of colour. You might fail your essay, but you had fun doing it. The end…
    EDIT: actually, if that fails: take a shower instead 😉

    Bee said:
    13 June , 2011 at 12:24

    Perfect advice! I am officially subscribing to this blog.

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